Archives for : sex

Condom in my Son’s Wallet

google walletBy Eric McKinley King

So I grab The Kid’s wallet this morning to put a few dollars in it and discovered that he had recently become a condom carrying member of the teenaged community. My immediate thought was, this dude is barely responsible enough to keep-up with his wallet, much less to use a condom. But in this case, I suppose over-ambition is better than the alternative. Of course it was also cause for conversation, so I waited ’til we were eating dinner to bring it up. Segueing from a totally unrelated conversation about … I said, “Speaking of … why’d you take a condom without asking and put it in your wallet?”

Honestly, I was almost scared of the answer. Then I remembered I was talking to a 14 year old boy.  So, of course he said, “I don’t know.”  I asked if that was the first and only one he took. He said, yes. I asked him if he felt like needed it. He said, no. We were both a little uncomfortable and there seemed to be a mutual sympathy for having to put each other through this, yet we both understood it was entirely necessary.

I told him, while it was wrong to have taken it without asking me, I thought he should keep it. Yeah, he wasn’t exactly expecting to hear that. And I’m pretty sure I wasn’t expecting to say that either.

There were a few conditions, however:

1.) He still had to ask me for it, if only for the sake of reinforcing the principle of the matter and because I wanted him to hear me say, “Yes.”

2.) He also had to store it responsibly, not exposed, half-hanging out of his wallet.

3.) He had to tell me if he used it.

4.) And finally, he had to know how to use it, which meant I had to show him how to properly inspect, open and unroll a prophylactic (sans the banana).

Then I desperately pleaded with him to talk to me about any and everything that happens, before it happens–which I fully realize may not happen.  But the most important part of the conversation came post-demonstration. I spoke to him very candidly about my experiences and the perspective I’m afforded as an adult that I didn’t have as teenager. I told him about the unplanned pregnancies (him being one) and the fact that I’m practically a unicorn for never having contracted an STD. I even showed him the (positively negative) HIV screening I took last month.

None was meant to scare him, but impress upon him a greater sense of responsibility. We’ve always had a unique relationship and never was that more evident than tonight. It had its awkward moments, but it was also peculiar thrill to see him look at me with disbelief and reverence at the same time. He knows he’s getting intel that most of his peers are not. And I found myself thinking about how much I could’ve used this kind of wisdom at his age–how many of my friends could’ve–how many of his friends could now.


It’s a Google wallet I got him last year ’cause I figured it was too red for him to misplace or lose. Embossed on the front is, “I’m Feeling Lucky.”

40 days Without Sex

Maybe you have been been wondering where I have been and why NO posts. Well, I have been starving myself of pizza, porn and sex for lent … 40 days. You would think maybe I would wind up writing more but, on the contrary, it was just the opposite.

Things I learned about myself:

There is power in prayer and I am a strong-willed son of somebody. #DADsRULE

No one I could really talk to about what was going on but God.  I had many conversations with the big guy upstairs as I held on to every hour without those three things.  Since prayer is really just a conversation with God we are friends more than ever now.

You can learn a lot about yourself when you devoid yourself of the things that give you most pleasure LOL-> I learned that I have the will of giants.  To go that long without pizza, that’s a strong willed human, to go without porn that’s the stuff legends are made of, but to go without sex, that’s God-like … pun intended.

The kids were alright.  I thought it would be like Daddy was on his period but actually I was much better than when I am hungry. When I haven’t eaten there is Hell to pay! My kids knew I was observing lent but only knew about the pizza, of course.

How do you deal with adversity when you don’t have those vices to make you feel better? That’s the true test.  The true grade comes with how you are when that period “without” is over. I’m a work in progress everything can’t be under dad’s rule.  Some things are beyond man, especially this man.


Falling Asleep After Sex Means

I LOVE YOU, GIRL! Studies prove it. I don’t have to cuddle , let me sleep. Now, stop doubting my love!

Psychologists at the University of Michigan and Albright College in Pennsylvania, surveyed 456 men and women and concluded that the reason we pass out after sex is because we have a desire for bonding and affection with my woman.  Huh?

All seriousness aside, I can see how falling asleep after sex could mean that. But if you put in work, dose off, then wake up like your car is being stolen and proceed to run out the bedroom like you can actually catch the thief … No love there. You just dosed and realized you f’d up and fell asleep after sex.

But if you feel comfortable enough to go to sleep and not have a second thought.  Then wake up the next morning roll over to go at it again or cuddle … That’s love there!

For the longest I never really wanted to cuddle.  I would come in the door with my excuse or be setting it up throughout the visit.  Even if I stayed the night, I wouldn’t go to sleep.  I would be tired as hell the next day.

One of my homeboys would never stay at a woman’s crib, no matter what. Now that’s gangsta!

Things have changes.  #DADsRULE and I need stability and love, so I SLEEP!

#DADSRULE > Hopefully women start getting the hint that every emotion a man feels for her is not worn on his sleeve, sometimes it’s in his sleep.  Men love differently than women; sometimes it’s not as obvious as calling you 24 times a day.

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