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The Rock of Fatherhood

Rock-daughter

Last weekend Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson appeared on Oprah’s “Master Class” on her OWN network and his most interesting and touching topic revolved around his relationship with his 14 years old daughter, Simone.

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“Throughout the ups and downs, I’ve realized that the most important thing that I could do with my daughter is lead our life with love.”

“Not success. Not fame. Not anything else. But, ‘I’m always here for you. I love you.'” – Dwayne Johnson

Watch the clip of the interview with Oprah, the Rock get’s very emotional recalling when he asked his daughter what she loved about their relationship.  Check the clip out here.  Being a father is special. Happy Fatherhood Friday!

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Xzibit of a Father

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This Fatherhood Friday, we shout out 1CoolDad, rapper Xzibit. He lost one son prematurely but has two sons that he is raising into men, Gatlyn and Tremayne. It’s Fatherhood Friday!  Salute, X to the Z!  #DadsRule

“I became a father at the age of 19. Now, at that age along with a definite lack of maturity you can only do two things when it comes to being a father. One, rise to the occasion and sacrifice for the safety and stability of your child. Or two, fail miserably.”

“My responsibility is to send decent human beings out into society.” – Xzibit

 

LA Dads Meet the New Lincoln Navigator

Automotive enthusiasts and cool dads based in the Los Angeles area, Daddys Cool has the inside scoop on an event you do not want to miss. Come out and drive the all-new 2015 Lincoln Navigator at an “Afternoon of Indulgence.”  Visit www.LincolnJourney.com for details on an intimate  experience in Santa Monica on November 22nd, which kicks off the LA Auto Show produced by Automotive Rhythms.

Everyone who test drives the new ?Navigator? with Automotive Rhythms will also receive a ticket to the auto show. Afternoon of Indulgence is hosted by celebrity blogger KarenCivil with a performance by Grammy nominated recording artist Raheem Devaughn with art by Demont Pinder, fashion from House of Kas and music from DJ BHen. RSVP

2015 Lincoln Navigator

Fit Fathers Day Video Will Change Your Life

Fit Fathers Day has nothing to do with lame ties, stinky cologne or boring socks. This Father’s Day is about your life and your families, dad!

Through a partnership led by Fit Fathers, Daddy’s Cool has joined Mazda and Volkswagen in the effort to forever change the way we view Father’s Day.  Let’s celebrate the right way. Fit Fathers Day is born! WATCH the VIDEO now. Join the movement and Spread the word. We want this video to go viral. #FitFathersDay #DadsRule

 

To take the pledge and for more infromation www.FitFathersDay.com 
Hashtag #FitFathersDay to win prizes and more!

 

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Weekend To Do in DC 4/26

md day

For the dad on a budget in the DC area there are two major events going on this weekend that you don’t want to miss. The first, which  I have attended previously, is Maryland Day on the campus of the University of Maryland. This is a FREE outdoor festival loaded with sun and fun. Visit Maryland Day for more info.

USA Science_Logo

I have never been to the USA Science Festival but I heard great things from the woman who put together my daughter’s computer coding class. It’s FREE and is happening both Saturday and Sunday so you can attend both events if you like.  If your kids have any interest in cool experience or engineering and or science which most kids do, this is a winner.  The inside scoop is that you should register your kids because their will be raffles and giveaways.  Visit USA Science Festival for more information.

 

 

 

 

Young New Dads Most Stressed

depressed dad2Becoming a new father can be overwhelming no matter the age but a new study shows that men in their early 20’s are 68 percent likley to suffer from depression during fatherhood. The survey was taken over a 20 year period from 1994 to 2014 and included over 10,000 men who became fathers between the ages of 24 and 32.

The findings published in Pediatrics on April 14, state the risk of paternal depression during the first five years of fatherhood rose 10 percent in the younger fathers as opposed to the older men. The study done by The National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health is very important as not a lot of attention has been paid to depression of father’s and how it can affect a child’s development.

The study also showed a greater incidence of depression among fathers who lived with their children, and even higher levels of depression among black and Hispanic fathers.

What is not clear is how accurate this survey is with the 10 questions asked of the men regarding feelings of unhappiness, how well-liked they felt, and if they were tired. I think young men are much less settled, so they naturally want to do and feel they are missing more, which can make them feel most stressed. Older men have done quite a bit usually and are more set in their ways so questions hit them in a different way.

The bottomline is the discussion has begun and some attention is being paid to fathers as it relates to paternal depression.  It is something worth investigating more.

 

Fatherhood Friday: A Daily Walk

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#Fatherhood is a daily walk. Take time to Make your kids better. Love+Nurture+Lead #DadsRule.

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Black Fathers Doing More Parenting

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While President Obama and many others are calling for a state of emergency on Black fathers, things are not as bleak as the media would have you think.

According to a recent report by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, black fathers spend more time rearing their children than white and Hispanic fathers.

In the study 70 percent of Black fathers were most likely to have bathed, dressed, diapered or helped their children use the toilet every day compared with 60 percent of white fathers and 45 percent of Hispanic fathers.

A higher percentage of black fathers spent more time driving their kids to activities than white fathers and more black fathers helped their children with homework every day compared with Hispanic dads and white ones.

Now I am not saying Black fathers should ease up or take fatherhood any less lightly.  It’s just good to know that Black fathers are on the right track.  Just thought we would share.  #DadsRule #FatherhoodFriday

25 Things Daughters Wish Daddy Knew

A funny thing happened to Tara Hedman, a mental health counselor, as she sat in an auto repair shop watching a daddy play with his daughter.  She began tofather_daughter think about what that time meant to that young child.  What would that little girl say if she could lay out all the questions and give her dad a road map of what to do and say?  Hedman wrote a blog about it on Huffington Post and this is what she came up with …

“So, to all the daddies with little girls who aren’t old enough yet to ask for what they need from you, here is what we wish you knew:

1. How you love me is how I will love myself.

2. Ask how I am feeling and listen to my answer, I need to know you value me before I can understand my true value.

3. I learn how I should be treated by how you treat my mom, whether you are married to her or not.

4. If you are angry with me, I feel it even if I don’t understand it, so talk to me.

5. Every time you show grace to me or someone else, I learn to trust God a little more.

6. I need to experience your nurturing physical strength, so I learn to trust the physicality of men.

7. Please don’t talk about sex like a teenage boy, or I think it’s something dirty.

8. When your tone is gentle, I understand what you are saying much better.

9. How you talk about female bodies when you’re “just joking” is what I believe about my own.

10. How you handle my heart, is how I will allow it to be handled by others.

11. If you encourage me to find what brings joy, I will always seek it.

12. If you teach me what safe feels like when I’m with you, I will know better how to guard myself from men who are not.

13. Teach me a love of art, science, and nature, and I will learn that intellect matters more than dress size.

14. Let me say exactly what I want even if it’s wrong or silly, because I need to know having a strong voice is acceptable to you.

15. When I get older, if you seem afraid of my changing body, I will believe something is wrong with it.

16. If you understand contentment for yourself, so will I.

17. When I ask you to let go, please remain available; I will always come back and need you if you do.

18. If you demonstrate tenderness, I learn to embrace my own vulnerability rather than fear it.

19. When you let me help fix the car and paint the house, I will believe I can do anything a boy can do.

20. When you protect my femininity, I learn everything about me is worthy of protecting.

21. How you treat our dog when you think I’m not watching tells me more about you than does just about anything else.

22. Don’t let money be everything, or I learn not to respect it or you.

23. Hug, hold, and kiss me in all the ways a daddy does that are right and good and pure. I need it so much to understand healthy touch.

24. Please don’t lie, because I believe what you say.

25. Don’t avoid hard conversations, because it makes me believe I’m not worth fighting for.”

Good to hear a daughter’s perspective. Read the full blog on HuffPost >># DadsRule

Fatherhood Friday TD Jakes

Fatherhood Friday with the good Bishop T.D. Jakes, father of five, movie producer and chief pastor at the megachurch, The Potter’s House.

 

“… Being a father is a painful process.  Being there and standing there and not running because you’re tired, and not running because you want to quit, and not running because you’re not happy every day means there’re going to be some pins stuck in you.  But somebody has to, having done all to stand, stand there anyway and go through the painful process of rebuilding our families.” – T.D. Jakes

#FatherhoodFriday is the new #FF … #DadsRule

 

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DC Race 4 Every Child Oct. 5

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My twins , now 7, were born premature and Children’s Medical Center was vital to their development.  Saturday, October 5th, we give back.  Calling Fathers, sons, daughters and families join DaddysCool and Fit Fathers for a 5k Race for Every Child.  The event will help fund specialized medical care, research into childhood diseases, and important wellness and preventive services to keep all children healthy through supporting Children’s National Medical Center.

DaddysCool will be out there running and included is a dash for kids 10 – Under, so the kids can be apart of it.  My son, Arin, one of the aforementioned preemies will be running.

Join the Hyundai Hope On Wheels team t for this high-profile DC-area family fun run/walk to raise awareness of Pediatric Cancer. Sign up today for the #Race4EveryChild 5K by joining our team. Please select “join a team” and choose “Hyundai Hope On Wheels” under the “corporate” menu. 


We are looking forward to seeing you out there!

For More Info

https://www.facebook.com/events/1401397990080375/

 

Fatherhood Friday New Batman

With all the talk swirling about the next Batman being the former DareDevil, Ben Affleck, we firgured at Daddyscool we would deflect some of the Bruce Wayne hysteria in showing the cool dad in Affleck. Read some of what he has to day about fatherhood.  #FF is the new #FatherhoodFriday

Interruption:  Check out the Twitter frenzy http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/heat-vision/ben-affleck-as-batman-negative-613619

Now, back to your regularly scheduled program  … #DADsRule

“I think we all like to see ourselves as good dads, but there’s also that fear, ‘Oh, I don’t want to be like my father,’ or, ‘I hope my kid doesn’t turn out like me.’ You know, I have those feelings too. So the key is optimism.” Ben Affleck

“”I love being a father, it’s wonderful. It’s changed my life. All the clichés are true.” Ben Affleck

 

Ben Affleck and his kids ben affleck.1 Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner take their kids to karate class

 

Cool Dad Site Fit Fathers Launches

FitFathers.com recently launched and is just what the doctor ordered in today’s bad health habit, never-ending work and mass-connectivity driven world.  Health, nutrition, quality family interaction, and exercise have taken a backseat. Fast food, sodas, gaming, the Internet, and digital communication have supplanted home-cooked meals, adventurous family vacations, reading, direct personal communication, and active living. With this threatening wave of mass digital confusion and lack of healthy habits, today’s kids, are expected to have a shorter life expectancy than their parents, studies show.

Fit Fathers site is cool dad approved.  Proactive dads must be proactive in every way!  As important as it is to be proactive in your child’s life, it is just as important to be proactive in your pursuit of good health.

The web site is the vision of Kimatni Rawlins, the president and publisher of the automotive media and marketing portal, Automotive Rhythms.  He is definitely about the life.  I remember when he was about 50+ pounds heavier and eating potato chips like Lays was going out of business.  He has since changed his lifestyle and mission. His family has followed suit and it is a joy to see.  We work out together at his social workouts that brings the families to the track to interact and exercise. He has inspired me and mine and now that the site is live it can hopefully inspire a new health revolution for fathers around the globe.   It’s not just all health, it’s cool stuff on the site.  CHECK IT OUT!  www.fitfathers.com

 

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Single Dad Needs Help

The story of Stanley Young, a single dad of eight, hit home not just because he lost his home in my hometown but because all he wants is to provide for his kids.  This is all any single dad or mother wants to be able to do. He was rendered helpless when his home was burned down.  It warmed my heart when rapper Nas immediately stepped in to start a campaign on the out-of-work construction worker’s behalf.  Nas put in $5000 and challenged the nation to meet at $20,000 goal and he would put in another $5000, which he has done.  The Young family still needs your help.  Act now!

Visit https://www.crowdtilt.com/campaigns/help-the-young-family/ for more info and PLEASE donate what you can.  #DADsRule

See The Young Family’s story, it’s gut-wrenching.

The Pains of FatherHood

Being a dad can be HARD! Protect yourself early and often. This Durex commercial hits it on the head LOL  I love being a father and wouldn’t change it for the world, but this is funny.  #DADsRule

 

Measure of a Man

Sidney Poitier #FatherhoodFriday

“Of all my father’s teachings, the most

enduring was the one about the true measure

of a man. That true measure was how well he

provided for his children, and it stuck with me

as if it were etched in my brain.”

Sidney PoitierThe Measure of a Man: A Spiritual Autobiography

Sidney says

Condom in my Son’s Wallet

google walletBy Eric McKinley King

So I grab The Kid’s wallet this morning to put a few dollars in it and discovered that he had recently become a condom carrying member of the teenaged community. My immediate thought was, this dude is barely responsible enough to keep-up with his wallet, much less to use a condom. But in this case, I suppose over-ambition is better than the alternative. Of course it was also cause for conversation, so I waited ’til we were eating dinner to bring it up. Segueing from a totally unrelated conversation about … I said, “Speaking of … why’d you take a condom without asking and put it in your wallet?”

Honestly, I was almost scared of the answer. Then I remembered I was talking to a 14 year old boy.  So, of course he said, “I don’t know.”  I asked if that was the first and only one he took. He said, yes. I asked him if he felt like needed it. He said, no. We were both a little uncomfortable and there seemed to be a mutual sympathy for having to put each other through this, yet we both understood it was entirely necessary.

I told him, while it was wrong to have taken it without asking me, I thought he should keep it. Yeah, he wasn’t exactly expecting to hear that. And I’m pretty sure I wasn’t expecting to say that either.

There were a few conditions, however:

1.) He still had to ask me for it, if only for the sake of reinforcing the principle of the matter and because I wanted him to hear me say, “Yes.”

2.) He also had to store it responsibly, not exposed, half-hanging out of his wallet.

3.) He had to tell me if he used it.

4.) And finally, he had to know how to use it, which meant I had to show him how to properly inspect, open and unroll a prophylactic (sans the banana).

Then I desperately pleaded with him to talk to me about any and everything that happens, before it happens–which I fully realize may not happen.  But the most important part of the conversation came post-demonstration. I spoke to him very candidly about my experiences and the perspective I’m afforded as an adult that I didn’t have as teenager. I told him about the unplanned pregnancies (him being one) and the fact that I’m practically a unicorn for never having contracted an STD. I even showed him the (positively negative) HIV screening I took last month.

None was meant to scare him, but impress upon him a greater sense of responsibility. We’ve always had a unique relationship and never was that more evident than tonight. It had its awkward moments, but it was also peculiar thrill to see him look at me with disbelief and reverence at the same time. He knows he’s getting intel that most of his peers are not. And I found myself thinking about how much I could’ve used this kind of wisdom at his age–how many of my friends could’ve–how many of his friends could now.

PS

It’s a Google wallet I got him last year ’cause I figured it was too red for him to misplace or lose. Embossed on the front is, “I’m Feeling Lucky.”

Jay Z Blue About Fatherhood

In a new video promo for his album, Jay-Z discusses how his shortcomings as a father and husband stem from not having a father himself.  In his new song “Blue,” Jay reveals his fears of fatherhood andjay-z-blue-ivy in “Heaven,” he discusses his interaction with his daughter Blue Ivy for all those willing to listen.  His new album Magna Carta Holy Grail drops soon; actually July 4th, if you have a Samsung. So you will have to wait.

If there is one thing that can be said about his music is that he sprinkles heartfelt truth here and there.  This is something that can’t be said about most Hip Hop these days.  It would appear that with being a dad he is shedding more of his braggadocio and bling to show more of his makeup as a man.

“I have a daughter,” Jay-Z explains. “It’s the paranoia of not being a great dad.” Fatherhood will change you! If it doesn’t you are not doing it right. You can take that to the bank.

 

Alpha Dad: Bosses Just Don’t Understand

There was a recent article Alpha Dads: Men Get Serious About Work-Life Balance in Bloomberg Business Week. It was about struggling working menAlpha dad that balance work and playing an equal role as a parent at home.   How we don’t have an iconic figure leading the way. How we make it happen without giving up is actually a great discussion and an interesting problem. I say this as an unmarried full time parent. 

I recently came up to a Berlin wall at the job and agree it is a professional struggle.  Although, I told my boss I was a single dad, he never understood to what extent.  He, a parent himself, could never fully grasp how active I was in my children’s lives.  The fact that I am more like a “single mom” in terms of what one typically is hard to digest.  It is something that has to be explained and expressed if you are or want to be a very proactive dad and still be employed.  Not to say that you will be understood.  It is more acceptable for a mom to get off early from work, have personal phone calls and get a pass on parental tasks at the job than it is for a dad.  I understand the reasoning but it has to change! 

Check out this video below from MSNBC Morning Joe. It goes in on the women becoming bread winners and the role of parents switching. Once you get past that a few minutes in it gets good and real.  

QOTD: Running on Empty

We don’t expect a car to start unless the gas tank is filled, and we shouldn’t expect a child to function at her best if her “emotional tank” is running low. Here are the three things that fill a child’s emotional tank: eye contact, gentle touch, and undivided attention. (excerpt from Jan Hunt’s “22 Alternatives to Punishment”)

#DadsRule Question of the Day:running on empty

Have you filled your children’s emotional tank today?  How did you do it?

Make a commitment to not have your kids running on empty and see how they operate on a full tank or at least half full … :) Let’s be reasonable.

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